Counting Down

Tomorrow will be my first official day of Maternity Leave. I can't imagine being away from my work for an entire year but at the same time, I am completely excited about completing the million projects I have started and starting a few new ones while I am at it. Yes, I know--Rowan is going to take up a lot of my time and I will be amazed at how a year flies by. I have heard this many many times over the past little while but, what people don't know about me is that I have to be doing something and something will be more than just being a mommy to my new little guy. I am going to love being a mother. I am going to love spending time with him, singing to him, dressing him up, showing him off, watching his every change but...and this is a big but...I refuse to become "just" his mommy as I have seen so many people do. A baby comes and all of a sudden the woman that existed before her body was taken over by a little gremlin growing inside her is gone. Like pregnancy, I am sure motherhood will take over my every thought but being a mother doesn't mean giving up what makes each and everyone of us unique-- our self.

Speaking of self, I am looking forward to getting control of my body back. Rowan has been hurting my insides now for almost 9 months and the pain has gotten worse over the last few weeks. He moves and moves and sleeping has become impossible. I feel bad for John who must endure the tossing and turning and the sighing and the peeing and the drinking and, and, and...But, you know what, there are only a few more weeks left and then we are going to forget about everything challenging about pregnancy because we will have this adorable human being to care for and raise. Ana is sure that I will miss being pregnant. I am sure she is partly right. I am going to miss knowing that I am carrying precious cargo and that he is alive and well inside me. I am going to miss wondering about him and dreaming that is for sure. I am also going to miss having John wait on me hand and foot too (maybe that's what I will miss the most!). I have been spoiled and although I have tried to do as much as I could to help and prepare, the credit for keeping things together goes entirely to him. I have said this before, he makes my life easier and that couldn't have been more true than over the past 9 months. Come to think of it now...I am going to miss John talking to Rowan and that ridiculous look on his face when he sees Rowan kicking from inside. He loves his baby already and watching that love is something that I hope I will never ever forget.

We are almost ready for his arrival now. Here are a few pictures of the nursery in progress. Sue and Barbara did such an amazing job on Puff that it will be hard to leave him behind when we move some day. We have purchased the rocking/reclining arm chair for his room and it arrives on Tuesday. Once that is here, we will have everything we need and more to bring our little man home.